Summer A.D.

Summer A.D. began when we returned from our trip to Utah. It was during this time that Scott found out about the possibility of a position within UP that could take us back to Utah. So not only were we trying to enjoy the final weeks of summer, but also trying to spend time with friends and complete our Omaha bucket list with a possible move looming in the near future.
We managed to get in a visit to some of our favorite places like the Zoo and Freemont Splash Station. We also tried out a few new places like Twin Rivers and Bounce U.
 As soon as we found out that Scott got the job and we were for sure moving things got a little bit crazy. We filled our days with as many goodbye play dates as we could and I spent my nights, between nighttime feedings with a 1-month-old, organizing and cleaning in preparation to sell our house and move. After several days of little to no sleep and a whole lot of stress I was a walking Zombie. So much so that after running errands for several hours one day I looked in the rear view mirror to find that without even realizing it I had been sporting a pair of sunglasses that was missing one lense the entire time. The kids and I all got a good laugh out of it and I made sure to get a little bit more sleep that night. One of the bonuses of moving to Utah was the kids got an extra two weeks added onto their summer since school starts later here. Those weeks were filled with all the business of moving, getting ready for back to school, and house hunting; but we were grateful for a little bit of time to get settled before diving into a new school year. As crazy as Summer A.D. turned out to be, it was still pretty great.

Henry Doorly Zoo

 Freemont Splash Station

Twin Rivers

Bounce U

Brynn's Omaha Bestie Collette Morrow

Losing my mind.

Goodbye Omaha

As excited as we are for the opportunity to return to Utah, leaving our house and neighborhood we love so much is extremely hard to do. Scott and I had been looking at houses in Omaha for over two months before our house popped up on the market. The minute we saw it we knew that it was the perfect house for us and with only the tiniest bit of hesitation we put in an offer without ever stepping foot in the house (our realtor did go through for us and gave us two thumbs up). It checked off every single thing on our need list, most of our want list, and was WAY below our budgeted price. It seemed too good to be true and we felt so blessed. When we saw it in person for the first time it did not disappoint us at all! As we moved and got settled, little details that felt like tender mercies from heaven kept popping up all around us, confirming to us that this is exactly where our family was supposed to be - our amazing neighbors and friends the Meeks across the street, a family in our ward that lived just down the street had a daughter with a trach and were able to help me navigate all the Nebraska services, the school boundaries changing that summer to include us in Rohwer's boundaries (we were literally the last house in the cutoff), the bus stop being in our driveway, the list goes on and on. For the first 3 months we were so happy and hopeful for this new path in life we were started on, but then in the blink of an eye Ellie was gone and we were left to live in the house and life that had been so perfect for her and it all felt more like a cruel joke than a blessing. I am still struggling to make sense of why we were led away from everything and everyone we knew and loved just for Ellie to die and us to be left all alone to pick up the pieces of our shattered lives. The truth is, as much as I loved this house, it held the two most painful years of my life. The space and layout of the house was perfect and functionally I wish we could have lived in it forever. But emotionally, living there was torture. This house held our fondest memories with Ellie and leaving those behind feels impossible, but I have realized that I will never be able to fully heal and move on while living in the shadow of what should have been.
 I don't love the pictures our realtor took because they distort the rooms, so I added a few of my own, but here are some pictures and memories I never want to forget of our home in Omaha.

What our great room really looked like

After staging

This room on the main floor served as Mason's room for the first few months we were there and then became our office/library/mudroom for the rest of the time. It is staged in this picture and is not really what it looked like for us.

Our Master bedroom was ridiculously huge. It actually felt like a waste of space, but we grew to love it. It was a very refreshing place to be and our family often gathered there.  The reading nook in the corner was one of my favorite places in the house, especially after we turned it into my Ellie corner. Ellie's corner was taken down for staging in these pictures, but the picture below shows how it really was.

The basement was probably our favorite part of the whole house. The pictures don't do justice of just how nice all the finishes were. One side served as Scott's dream theater with many a night spent down there watching movies. The other side was made to be a game room but for us was the perfect toy room. So much open space to play. We had Brynn's kitchen and school set up on one side, the basketball hoop on another, and still had plenty of room for Brynn and Miles to ride around on the wiggle car together.

All the toys packed up for staging.

What the toy room really looked like.

We were very excited to have a great backyard when we got the house. Truthfully we didn't get as much use out of it as we expected. The yards are so swampy for all of spring and the first half of summer that we couldn't really play in the bottom half of our yard. With the yard west facing and backing up to the busy street we didn't get nearly as much use out of the deck in the evenings as we imagined. During the summer months we did have plenty of water parties on the playset, though. We spent most evenings playing in the front yard with neighbors and friends. 

Last Thursday, Scott and the kids loaded up the car and said goodbye to Omaha as they headed out for the last long drive to Utah. Ryan and I didn't fly out until later that afternoon so I spent the morning doing some last minute cleaning and organizing before we listed our house for sale. I was filled with so much emotion as I walked through each room reliving so many memories and emotions of the last two years. I sat and rocked Ryan in the nursery - the same room that had been so carefully set up with Ellie's crib and all her equipment before we arrived our first night in Omaha. The same chair I had sat and rocked a sick little Ellie the last night she was home and she wouldn't sleep unless she was in my arms. It was so painful to realize that never again would we live in a home that had memories of Ellie in it. I cried for Ellie, I cried for all the hopes and dreams that Omaha held in the beginning that had been shattered. I cried in fear of what this next move would hold for us. Before I knew it was was time to go and I locked up and left our wonderful neighborhood of Oakmont for the last time.

Summer B.C.

When I think back on this summer it is divided into two parts: before childbirth (B.C.) and after delivery (A.D.). In this post I will cover the first month of summer (B.C.) where we tried to cram in as much fun as we possible could before the baby came.
If I had to describe the month of June in two words they would be HOT and HUMID!! Now I know I was 9 months pregnant and carrying my own personal, internal furnace around, but I think anyone would agree that with temps in the high 90s and humidity of 60-80% it was pretty miserable. Twice a week we would start off the day by going to the kids tennis lessons. Since Mason was now in the older group that meant I got to sit through not one but two tennis lessons in the heat and humidity (yes, even at 9 am it was miserable). I don't mean to sound negative because I love keeping busy with the kids and providing them with fun opportunities like this, but it got to be pretty miserable for me. Monday - Thursday we would take Mason and Brynn to swim team where they got to cool down in the water as Miles and I roasted in the sun watching them. Did I mention it was extremely hot and humid? It got to the point that I just couldn't take it anymore and Miles and I would drop the kids off then go get drinks and slushies from Sonic and wait in the air conditioned car until swim team was over.

As we began our third summer in Omaha it was fun to have activities that we all looked forward to repeating. This year was even better because our neighbors and best friends, the Meeks, had a nanny instead of going to daycare so they were home during the day to play with and join us on many of our excursions. One of the things at the top of our summer bucket list was going to Bellvue Farms for their annual strawberry picking. We learned to go the first week instead of the last to get better strawberries. The kids loved finding and picking the biggest and juiciest strawberries they could find. They each filled their bucket with more strawberries than we could ever eat and then we went home and made our traditional homemade strawberry ice cream with them. We took a trip to the Children's museum per Brynn and Miles' request and despite Mason's protests (such a sad day for me - my boy has outgrown the children's museum). We were able to gain his cooperation by promising a trip to the big downtown slides after which is always a favorite. We visited the beach at Freemont Lakes with some of our friends and were even lucky enough to have Scott slip away from work for the day to join us. I was grateful to have him there since I felt like a beached whale and didn't want to do anything other than bask in the sun.
With the baby just a few weeks away I really did try to be productive around the yard and house, but the heat often got to be too much and we would just end up at the pool, which was the only place I felt even the slightest bit comfortable in my hugeness. When we weren't at the pool then the kids were hosting water parties for all of their friends in our backyard. I really think it might be their favorite activity of the summer.

I enjoyed and appreciated spending the evenings sitting on the front porch with my feet up watching the kids bike, rollerblade, and longboard down the hill not needing any hands-on assistance from me. I knew that was all going to change with the addition of a baby and didn't take a moment of it for granted.
Those are a few of the highlight of our summer B.C.